Courtney's View #7: Jokes & Quotes

I have a page in my journal just for jokes that seem to be common amongst my fellow staff! Anthropological work. Farangs, feel free to add to my cache with any local humor trends you've noticed!

1.) Man or woman typically being introduced, good-naturedly cracks a joke to break the ice. While pointing at many people, the person says, "He is my wife, she is my wife, he is also my wife....", until the laughter drowns he or she out. :)

2.) In a similar vein, my male coworkers like to point at each other saying, "He is having a baby."

3.) One of my coworkers gets called "Superstar" a lot, to everyone's immense delight. On a side note, I think this coworker is real close to achieving Nirvana; he is so chill, always calm, always more than kind. Anyway, at the flagpole ceremony each morning, someone will usually walk up to him, slap a chummy hand on his back and say, "He is superstar." Heads explode. I solemnly agree!

4.) When I do games that involve teams in class, students like to name the other team "Buffalo". The class erupts in cackles every time. I always thought Buffalo was a cool team name. But I recently found out it is a way to call someone superbly stupid. Oops!

5.)  I have a Polish coworker. Every time the weather gets cold enough that she wears a jacket, the other teachers endlessly make fun of her for being simultaneously cold and Polish. "Why you wear this?? You Polish!!!! hehehehehe" 

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The real reason I wanted to write about the above, is so that I could write about what I'm about to write about...

Another of my fellow teachers is the most classic British chap you could imagine. A real countryman, like on a PBS drama. He's awesome. If I was going to make a Thai joke list, I had to make a British slang list...

My future job is to be a translator of British to American.

1.) Cigarette = Stick of nonesense

2.) Whiskey = Glass of madness

3.) "You're a Lazarus!!" = A person who has recovered from being ill.

4.) "Did you hear any joy?" = Did you receive any good news?

5.) Faffing about = Frivolously fussing around, not getting much done. Context: Whatever is trying to be done is probably pointless anyway.

6.) "Let's have a good nose bag." = Let's eat some food.

7.) "Let's leg it." = Irish Goodbye

8.) Discreetly say, "Do one" while pointing your thumb towards the door. = Irish Goodbye

9.) "Come and play your bagpipes in my class, Teacher Xubin(Chinese teacher)." = "Come and play your traditional Chinese flutes in my class, Teacher Xubin."

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