My feelings here are similar to those at an amusement park.
I go in all excited ready to go on all the rides, eat all the food, and try to make friends with everyone I see walking. But then I get there. The rides are bigger than I imagined them to be, the food is more expensive than I thought they would be, and the people are more intimidating than I expected. As I walk up to get in line for a roller coaster I am feeling the nerves creep up on me, nerves I had never felt in such an extreme measure. I don't know what to do with myself, so I start talking to people in line with me about the experience we are about to have. We all share the same feelings. As we move up in line there is no going back now, and I need to go forward or be stuck, and I came here with the intention to go on the rollercoaster, so that is what I will do. The ride is over in a matter of a few blinks and I realize that it was the most fun I have ever had. The friends I had made and I grab some food because why not?
As I filled out my application for going abroad my mind filled with all the cool, fun adventures, all the new people I was going to meet, and all the new food I was going to try. It was about 7 months ago when I first started perusing this dream of mine. I couldn't wait for the adrenaline to hit me and start my life in a new country. I would be living the dream. As it got closer to the date I got more and more anxious, but more of a good anxiety, like wait for a package in the mail, but instead of a package I would be packing up and leaving for 5 months. Basically the same right? That's what I thought about everyday until the day. Everyone around me was sad to see me leave, but even though I would miss them terrible my mind was on my upcoming journey. I kept that mindset up until I walked away from my mom and JFK airport to go join the rest of the kids that were about the do the same as me. It's like that type of feeling when you pause for a minute just before you get in line for the roller coaster you have been wanting to ride. But I was off. I made some friends waiting for my plane. As I sat on the plane to Sevilla I finally understood what I was doing. I finally got what my parents had been talking about. I was about the change my life. As walked in the hostel I was going to stay in for orientation week and took a deep breathe and let go into the rollercoaster I was about to ride on. Even though it has barely been a week in Spain I know my journey will be and has already been filled with ups and downs, just like a rollercoaster. But I know when I get off this ride I will not regret getting on it.