Auf Wiedersehen und Hallo

This week I have been packing my bags and saying my goodbyes. Yesterday I spent my last day at home hanging out with my best friend Caden and my family. This morning I woke up at 3 and headed to the airport. And right now I’m on a plane to Washington DC. 

The past few days have been very, very busy. I was on a road trip to Iowa with my family until a week ago, so I didn’t have a lot of time to prepare. After that, I was frantically doing laundry and buying last minute necessities before I left. I then just had to fit it all in my suitcase. I went through the packing list I had over and over and over trying to make sure that I got everything. There was definitely stuff that I didn’t bring, not because I forgot, but because I figured I could just buy it once I get to Germany. In the end, I might have overpacked but through vacuum bags and a little elbow grease everything fit. 

On Monday of this week I had my going away party. Everyone that I knew came over for one last goodbye. We had lots of dessert and some healthy food too, played games, talked, took pictures, and said goodbye. It was very fun being able to see so many people that I love all in one place, but as the party went on I said more and more goodbyes until everyone had left. That evening was really when the reality of what I was doing set in. The fact that I won’t see any of those people for 10 months is still insane to me. 

Yesterday I spent the whole day just hanging out with my best friend and my family. We all had dinner at a fancy Korean restaurant in my city. After dinner though, I had to say goodbye to Caden. I managed to hold back my tears until we got home from dropping him off at his house, and then I just started bawling. Then this morning saying goodbye to my family, who I have only gone without seeing for a maximum of 2 weeks, for 10 months. It really can’t get any more real than standing in the airport and hugging each member of your family while you’re all crying together. No matter how much I want to go to Germany, or how excited I am, it’s still really hard to say goodbye to the people that you care for.

Now, while I am saying goodbye to some things I am also saying hello to so many more. After I landed in DC (yes I am writing this over multiple flights) and waited a good 50 minutes for my bag at baggage claim, I got to meet so many people, some that I knew from Denver, and others that I was meeting for the first time. Everyone was so nice and we were all nervous and excited together. Getting on this plane to Frankfurt was a big step, but one that I got to take with so many other amazing people. There were a lot of small positive things though that made me hopeful for the coming year ahead. The empty seat next to me on the plane, getting to have a really sweet conversation with the people sitting next to me, and the flight attendant helping me keep my dinner tray from sliding into my lap just to name a few. I think focusing on small moments of joy like those is essential to the coming months and helping me remain optimistic. 

So, I am two and a half hours from Frankfurt. I am missing everyone that I left at home and will continue to miss them. But, more than anything, I am feeling hopeful for the year ahead and ready to face the challenges that I know are ahead knowing that I have both old and new friends that will help me through them.